My Connection with '8'

When I look up at numbers, the Hindu-Arabic numerals(0-9) I have always wondered "What do you people mean??What is the evolution of numbers??" But all of a sudden I was struck with the question, "How do the numbers relate to humans?? individuals??" to which I found a rather bizarre and shocking answer..!This is how I found My Connection to the number 8 (eight)..!!
When I searched the Wiki for '8' it listed the history of 8 beginning with its involvement in Maths to the various other fields in which it is referred as in culture,astronomy,music,sports..!! The info from wiki is pretty interesting. What interests me most is the role that this number has played in my life, rather 'playing' in my life!
Apart from the strange fact that I am born on Oct 9th rather than Oct 8th,( which doesnt make any difference since I celebrate both dates :) )everything else in my life seem to be in 'line' with '8'.Since I do not have any solid proof from my childhood regarding '8' (which Iam very sure would have existed) I started up investigating with my 10th std mark sheet. And Voila..!!I was right. Let me walk you through "My Journey With Eight" :)
1.My register number for 10th std public exam was 891944 which totals to '8'. I was suppose to have got 891945 but the tragic death of a girl from my class(Manjula) tossed me into this number. You may think "whats so strange in this??! Well read on..;)
2.My second material was my 12th mark sheet.What a shocker or maybe as you think a "coincidence" that my 12th exam register number was 465506 which even totals to 8.
Ok.. what else??
3.My college was listed as the 8th college in 2006(when I completed 12th) TN counselling book.
4.And now, My TCS employee ID is (****55)( sry cant reveal :) ) which even totals to 8.:)
5.And most importantly, my future is with 8..!:) My frnds will know the true meaning of this..:)
You may still say its a coincidence, Yeah..maybe..but its more than a mere coincidence for me..
I strongly believe that every number relates to every individual in one way.. or the other..!Its upto us to find out..Well! that's my "Number" story..whats yours???:);)

Everyday observations :)

What do people do on their way to office or the vice versa..??Have anyone took time to look at people sitting near and around you??Have you come out of your ipod or iphone or mobile music or fm radio and looked around??Maybe rarely.
I am no born observer but when I realised that I was too much addicted to my ipod that it stays in my ears all through my travel and work I took up another hobby to eradicate this.That is how I started observing people(note it,"observing" not "staring" :) )
To those who have no idea I will tell you that observing people around gives you peace of mind,makes you laugh, makes you think from their perspective!Strange but true. As long as I have noticed,things that people mostly do is

--sleep : This category is the one that shocks me the most!! They get in the bus, find a seat, make themselves comfortable and 'boom' they are in their dreams!!! At every bump in the road they stir as if in bed and thats it!!! I really used to wonder what are they too tired about!!work or eating too much from canteen..:P I categorize them as "Lucky ones".

--talk loudly over the mobile : This category is the one I hate!!Come on people!!! there are others near you and this is no private quarters of yours!!!! I have heard people talk about family issues,advicing others, love chats,fighting to husband or wife, solve office issues,talk to friends, inviting people..!!!Is there no other place for all this..!!!?I would suggest them to talk low or just deal it later coz others have problem too other than hearing their loud talks..!But these people are the merry makers as some of their talks tend to make you laugh..but never do that aloud!!!:P I categorize them as "Speakers"

--listen to songs : People of this category are interesting to watch..!They tend to involve with the song tapping their feets and shaking their heads..!Few smile and laugh to what they hear.They are never disturbing to anyone except the driver..!!Because they get down at their stops wearing headphones mingling with the music,leaving behind an hyper irritated driver shouting at them to wait till the bus stops!!!!:)They act as if they belong else where..and I have no idea what is that where!!! I categorize them as "Aliens"

--Eating :Ah..!!These people leave everybody's mouth to water and tummy's to grumble in the bus.They always have a stock of fruit or nuts or chocolates.!!Most people in this category are pregnant women and Iam not going to blame them.I categorize them as " Stock holders"

--Looking outside : I really pity these people. They tend to travel on the same road every morning and night, they tend to look at same things every time. But what is so interesting outside that they never want to miss it a single day!!? Or is it that they are lost in thought staring outside??Trying to find solutions to unknown problems??? I have no idea!!! I categorize them as " Watchers"

Other things I have noticed people do very rarely is play mobile games, watch videos,look out for their stop even though it is 15min away!!!
People surprise me a lot with such differences in characteristics and mannerism..They are really interesting to observe..
But..if you are planning to observe people, make sure you are not observed..:)

Bringing back to Life..

When I looked at my Blog's archive, there is no '2011'...! Its already 2011 April now..!Damn.. What was I doing all the time from September(my last post).!!There was loads happening in my life...happy,sad,exciting..Then why dint I pen them down?!In fact I have a steady net connection at home..!Gosh Ishu..!U have wasted a lot many months and days where there was so much going on..That got me thinking..a lot of thinking..! I kept on thinking about stuff, everything stupid,facts of life, blah blah..I was thinking even on my way to office and back home..Maybe its my suppressed thoughts for the past months that want a release from my heart and brain..!I realized if I leave my life to drag me it would drag me to the end of world. Why not take a reverse gear and drag my life around a bit..I have decided to give life to my blog and to my brain..Let me pump oxygen into it bit by bit..:):P Expecting more posts from me..:P Love you blog..:)

A piece from my diary...


I feel excited to write after a long time.:) Missed my blog and missed writing...happy to give a better job to my fingers than just coding..okayyy...jokes apart..:P
hi everyone...!!!
Life is a mystery, what you do in that is a history says someone great... I would never deny it. Coz things have changed a lot since I joined job...ehh...both in a good way and bad way. Maybe iam not creating a history but sure am I revealing all mysteries :)
The good thing is I learned to sit in a place and code for a long time and next to get up early and most of all to give full attendance...:) The bad thing is the same stuff mentioned.. :D But the best thing is Iam learning to cope up with both..! Initially I have to admit I hated being there, learning and taking test... but then I understood it is for a reason and that reason is for my good. Now for sure I love my job no matter what...But when you get into a job whether TCS or any other corporate just remember, “You are not here to waste time” and more than that threatening statement I would like to add, “Love what you do”. :) Our office is like a different world, once you get into it you will never know what happens outside...!! Whether its sunny or rainy..! Moreover, without internet at hostel I totally feel disconnected from the world. I even forgot to wish few of my friends on their birthdays..:(, which I would never forget doing...! Okay let us move on...!
About my training, first few days we had orientations dealing with what is what. Then we are put up in zones where you sit with your system and implement what you learnt (this is what they say :) ) The Tech sessions go on for a whole day where we sit at our cubicles and learn to code. We tend to discuss and chitchat with our associates:). We were divided into groups and asked to complete exercises and this goes on for weeks. In addition, the LS (Life Skill) sessions are about developing your language and presentation skills. We are asked to talk, express and improve. These sessions are quite interesting coz if you are good at expressing fluently this is all fun. However, for people who have trouble with that I would say, “please try” and its never a bad thing to try..! Here too we are made into groups and they expect us to interact :) That’s with training, sounds simple right..? :) Not a thought, it’s never simple.
From my point of view, I consider training as a place where u really learn. This learning is not just your coding and language skills but also different people. You tend to meet many people and get to know them. A few you may befriend and others whom you to tend to pass with a smile. I got to know many friends (call them as associates says my facilitator :) ) from a different college and place. Even few of my roommates are from another college and iam quite close to them. Therefore, it is a place where you recognise, like and share. I even learnt about few of my associates love stories, very interesting. :) We learn the basics but mostly we are on our own to do self-study. I find many among us making good use of this time and a few struggling very hard to cope up. That is a very good thing coz you don’t lose anything by trying. Whatever, I could say training is how you look at it, consider it a pup it’s very friendly and faithful to you but when you look at it as a big bad wolf sure it will bounce at you and tear you up.. :)
Coming to my life, the only things I do as a routine is go to office come back eat and sleep. (And obviously roaming and chatting with friends :)) Its not that I don’t have time to write or shoot pictures...that would be wrong, seriously wrong!!! I have time but no mind set! Yeah...that is the truth but I think I need to balance and make way for my stuff. Anyways, Iam hoping to write again and very soon :) Bye..

You...

I have always wondered what makes him so superior to you when it is you, who understands me the most...
I remember the times when I did want to cry, to drown myself in tears...you were always there to hold me...
Listening to every word I said...valuing every tear of mine as your own...
The moments when I wanted to break everything in the room, you were there...yet again...Telling me its ok...and that things will pass...
Reminding me the value of things, I would lose due to my anger....
All the while, I melt in love and dream about, would be of him but every time I get hurt coz of it, it is to you I turn...
You shouldn’t be there for me...but you are...To heal my heart...as my friend, comforter...
Making me realise my silly childhood fantasies of love...making the whole matured me...
Every night when I miss him...his nearness and voice...
It was you who accompanied me...you lay with me for hours letting me pour my depressions...
I slept many days in your arms knowing you never slept any of those nights...you could say iam selfish...but you don’t...
I keep asking myself...do I deserve you...?
I have shared everything with you...from morning walks to my last dreams...
Every tiny detail that I have not shared with my mom or gotten advice from dad...
All my likes and dislikes...my favourites and specials...my fears and strengths...
I never have expected a nod in approval from you...nor have you said a “no” for anything...
Because we both know, you adore everything I do...
I have known you from my childhood long before I did ever know his name...
You have known my feelings for him even before he could have realised...
Though it is to you I come every day to share my thoughts...it is him, who holds my heart...
This in no way makes you loved less...coz...
You mean more to me as I have been to you...and we have never hidden it no matter what....
Moreover, it is no secret that I love you...
My Dear Diary....

_Ishu...

Tomorrow...

We had a terrible fight but all I could remember is it has no reason...
It wasn’t your fault neither was mine...yet we fought unlike any other day...
None could question the love between us nor could we both doubt it...
Every time, a thought of tomorrow calms me down...
Therefore, we part, with you angry and me in tears...
“Yes...always a tomorrow” I thought...
All day I have been thinking of you...expecting you to turn up at my door...
Or to give me a call or at least a missed call to remind me that you care...you love..
However, you did not...
I kept running your angry face in my mind...confusing the reason for your anger and our fight...
I sensed you weren’t angry on me and it was something else...
Alternatively, was it my imagination...!
I felt sorry for letting out my words to counter yours...
I wish today could pass soon so that we could make peace tomorrow...
We always had a tomorrow...
By noon, I started planning things for us to do together...to shop, your favourite movie and dinner...
Feeling excited I started picking out dresses to wear, maybe your choice black would cool you out...
Dancing across the room and singing didn’t pull my spirit; I was desperate for tomorrow...
By eve, all I could do was staring at my mobile...you did not call or text me...weird...you were never like this...
Forgetting my ego and forgiving you, I called up only to end up in no answer...
Trying again and still the same...maybe I could wait until tomorrow...
Dinner never occurred to me when I realised you didn’t call back...
I remain curled up in the couch wondering about you...waiting for you...
Irritated I called up again, this time you did cut the call...not long after sending a message that you would call tomorrow and that you were angry still...
Relief flooded yet only tears did fall...I found myself crying, louder and louder...
My heart tore at missing you...loneliness crowded me...
After a long while, I stopped crying and went to my room to look at our snaps...gaining strength from them...
Once in my bed, I looked at the ceiling, my artificial stars and moon smiled at me...
Turning my head, I found the movie DVD “tomorrow never dies”
I tried to smile but failed miserably...a single day without you hurts like anything...
I kept promising never to fight with you again...
Tomorrow will be our day and I know you are waiting for the same...
A sob left me...why doesn’t tomorrow come soon...! that I could hold your hand again...
Yes tomorrow...
I felt myself drifting to sleep and it was dreamless...
The next thing I could see was you...standing before me...
You gave me flowers but I couldn’t hold nor smell them...
You cried loads for me to come back...but wasn’t able to...
You said words that I could hear but never reply...
Maybe if you did know there was never a tomorrow for us...for me...you would have made our yesterday worthy...!

_Ishu...

The Change...

Boredom and power cut drove me down the streets of my place one Sunday noon...
In my worn out faded jeans and black T, I walked the streets...
This is usually a busy street and the busiest part of the city due to various malls
However, today it seems deserted, nothing but a few tea stalls...
I dragged myself along kicking the empty cool drink can...thinking what I would have done if the generator had not failed...watching movie, baking cakes...
Having enjoyed life always, getting whatever and whenever I want makes my life far from bored...until today...
Thinking of last week when my parents did come down to see me, along with my cousins...it was much more than fun...all day shopping and stuff..
I never had a “no” from my parents and I never waited for a “yes”
So life was obviously fun...until today as I said, something was different, a feel of amiss...
I searched my pocket for my mobile but then I realised it was home...
I have forgotten it...god! But I found something else...a paper material...
I pulled out and found a 1000 rupees note.. How it got there, I could not remember...
That too in my faded jeans..! Maybe my mom kept it there or me...! I was always careless with money...! Therefore, I must be my fault...
However, I continued walking kicking the can further...a smile spread across my face...
Now I got something to spend...but what could I get? Looking around all the malls were closed...even café day...argh...!!
The petit teashops would never have change for 1000...maybe walking further, I could find few decent shops...!
Making up my mind I toddled forward...my mind kept thinking about what I could get...!!”Shopaholic” I muttered to myself...!
I walked and walked finally realising Iam far away from home...
This part of the city is new to me...several small teashops and a bakery...
On looking in, I found a well-stacked stall with cakes, breads and biscuits...
Far away from my mom’s view of hygiene, i made a face and walked out...
Just then a small boy in his rags dashed past me...he bought few loaves of bread with his money and started begging the shop owner to give extra...
I was surprised...who would beg to get another of that nasty stuff...
Before I could turn, the boy ran out with the same, so he was denied the extra stuff...
I sighed and started walking...turning the street I found the boy kneeling behind a broken cart...
Curiously, I headed towards him...i realised he wasn’t alone...he gave the bread to a weak looking woman, supposing his mother...
She had a baby in her arms...never in my life have I seen a baby as much close to a skeleton...
In addition to it, the family had a tiny puppy...they look as if they have starved for months...
The woman took herself one and gave rest of the so-called bread loaves to the boy...
My mind kept telling me to move away from this group and place that I started backing away...
To my utter shock, the boy gave half of his food to the puppy and patted him...
Even more, he ate with that same hand...ahh...i wanted to run away...!
What kind of people are these..!i started walking faster and towards a familiar street...
Once away from them I took a deep breath...iam fine I convinced myself...
I started walking again...hands in my pocket...I felt something inside me...my mind says keep going but I wanted to stop and do what? Think...!!!
Why am I bothered now...? I should have been happy to be away from the rags...but iam not...
I recalled their faces, the baby..i tried not to remember the boy feeding the pup even in his fainting state...and his mom smiling at his action..
What kind of mom would allow her child to be infected and allow the least bit of their food to feed a dog....!
I was confused...unable to conclude... Suddenly it dawned on me...
Maybe only a mom who knew the pain of starving...only she who wants to feed the petit life that depended on them knowing they would die without that would allow that...
I felt a strong feeling seep through me...this is a family....!
Once in my life did I let my heart rule my mind...i walked towards them...
They looked up strangely at my approach...
I took the money from my pocket and gave it to their mother...
She looked at me confused, realising the money she smiled at me faintly and then it widened...
I smiled at them...patted the puppy and turned away...
Tears gathered in my eyes...blocking my vision...still I walked without letting them fall...
I have walked several times on this road, carrying loads of bags, which I have shopped...
Now...I walk empty-handed nothing but tears to hold...
Yet I feel like the happiest person in the world...
I never looked back at them...yet I know... my life has changed forever...!


_Ishu...

Iam not Bothered...

Somewhere I couldn’t actually forget, in a crowded queue waiting for a movie ticket...
I bumped into you on my way out...our shoulders brushed and fingers touched...I guessed just a few seconds...
A few seconds that sent shocks through me...a few useless seconds of despair...
Before I could get out of awe and turn around, you were gone...
I did swoon at your touch...a mistaken touch that sent ripples through me...
However, you would never know...nor did u see me and eventually never sensed the chemistry...
Its useless to be thinking about you now...searching you in the vast crowd...
Not knowing your name or had seen your face...or having the guts to take chances...
Not knowing the meaning of our unexpected action, which had effect only on me...
A few seconds that had the ability to keep me awake all night...
You might have come with your girlfriend or your family...
Or there may be another girl in your life...
Iam not bothered...yeah...iam not...
Because...iam never gonna be in your life...even never gonna feel u again...
I know I could never hold your hand and walk down the beach..
Or wait sweet long hours till you get back from work...never...
Yet iam not bothered...
The thing I had with you..what should I call it...?a crush..?maybe...
They are everlasting and never demanding...
I don’t say you are my life and love...never my everything or world...
Nevertheless, you are something...a wonderful and unknown memory...
Oneday...i might fall in love with someone or give my hand in marriage...
That does not make me forget you...coz...you were my first crush...unknown but electrifying crush...
I did always remember the day we bumped into each other for years to come...
You not realising it and I dreaming over it...
You are something I did love to remember someday...while sipping my evening tea with an unknown smile in my lips...

_Ishu...